A VISUAL MASTERPIECE!!!
AN INSTANT CLASSIC!!!
GAME OF THE YEAR!!!
SOOOOOOO FUCKIN BORING!!!
Yes, Cuphead is gorgeous. It looks incredible. It's a graphic masterpiece. All of these things are true. But it's still a fuckin boring game. It's beautiful, it's hard, and it's boring.
Now whenever anybody attacks Cuphead the deified, people get pissed. "You're just no good." "You're just a shitty gamer." Am I? Nah. I'm not the best but I'm not shitty (I got invisibility in Golden Eye - fuck I'm old). But one shouldn't have to be The Wizard to enjoy a game.
In the end, all this game has are graphics and music (and actually a decent story and setup). It just happens to do those 2 things, especially the first, so well, so fantastically well, nobody seems to care that the game sucks. So much time and energy was put into the visual experience, they seem to have forgotten about the game experience. They fit a game around a graphic and just kept adding more bombs!!!, and more bombs!!!, and more bombs!!!
So what does this game need? Shigeru Miyamoto. If these characters were given a chance to thrive, in a real game world, with help from a true game designer, it could be mind-blowingly good. It could actually deserve the 10/10 scores.
So let's hold up our glasses to the future union between Nintendo and Studio MDHR and the beautiful baby they could make (if they just fuckin listen to me).